Always for a Loop
by crowleyhasfeelz
Summary: Jo has suddenly appeared and begging Dean for his help. Her mother was kidnapped from Heaven and Dean is the only one who may know how to help her get her back.


Dean covered his eyes with the back of his hand to block out the sun that was making its way into the shady motel room he had been asleep in. The night before was a distant memory from his mind or why he was in the hotel room to begin with. Had he been on a case and if so, what would have caused him to get as drunk as he did. He knew it was alcohol. Dean had been hit over the head, drugged and drunk enough times to know the difference between the three. This one was definitely a self-inflicted migraine.

Dean shifted to turned away from the sun until his eyes were fully adjusted to being awake. That is when his eyes landed upon another thing he could not remember. She seemed good looking enough and Dean mentally gave himself a high five. At least it appears like he was having fun. Dean was lacking in the department of fun as of late. That being noted, he also knew that he needed to get out of this situation as quickly as he could. Bedding them was one thing but next morning small talk was not really his cup of anything.

Grabbing his clothes, Dean quietly made his way into the bathroom and cleaned himself up. He made a mental note to take a shower as soon as he could. He would have taken one now, but he was not sure if this was his room or hers and he did not want her to wake up in order for him to find out. So the shower would have to wait a few hours. Dean ran some water over his face, glancing up at himself in the mirror. "You gotta be more careful," he whispered to himself. Dean made it out of the room and shut the door behind himself. Another bullet dodged. Now Dean just needed to figure out where he was and why he was here. Dean pulled out his phone to call Sam but it just went to voicemail. What the hell was going on and why could he not remember anything?

"You really need to lighten up on the drinking," Dean reached for his gun and turned quickly, not yet pulling it out until he knew exactly who had been speaking but no one was there.

Dean held on to his gun and continued looking around. There was no one in site but at least he found his baby. Dean removed his hand from his gun, shaking off the voice as being in his head. He then climbed into the driver's side of the car and ran his fingers over the familiar steering wheel. Gripping it tight, Dean sighed and then reached over to put his keys in the ignition. Baby purred to life and Dean smiled before looking up to back out, his smile quickly fading.

How much had he drank? Dean knew that he had to be hallucinating. The alcohol must still be coursing through his system. None of this way real. Jo was not real. Jo was dead. Dean closed his eyes tight and then opened them again, but she was still there, standing in front of his car. Dean cut the engine but remained in the car. This had to be a demon.

"What did you do with Sam?" Dean was not exactly sure why that was the first question that he asked, but he had not been able to get a hold of his brother yet.

"Why would I do something with Sam?" Fake Jo asked, a look of concern crossing her face. "Oh my god. Is he missing?"

Dean slowly got out of the Impala, making sure to watch his every move. A lot of the time if there was one demon, there was another one nearby. He was not going to take his chances with getting caught. Dammit, where the hell was Sammy?

"Dean," Fake Jo took a couple of steps toward Dean before stopping, her eyes fixed onto the gun held between his fingers. "Is Sam missing?"

"Who are you?" Dean avoided her question completely got back into business mode. "How did you even get Jo's body?"

"I was kind of born with it," Fake Jo laughed, putting her hands up in the air to make peace. "Dean, I promise it is me. Test me if you need to but it is me."

Dean held the gun in her direction and made his way slowly to the back of the car, opening the trunk and digging around. He would occasionally look over the trunk to make sure that she was still standing there and she had not moved an inch. He gathered up all that he needed to test if she was a demon or not and luckily … she passed.

"I don't understand," Dean pulled her into his arms, hugging her tightly. She couldn't breathe for a moment but she was not going to ruin the moment by pulling away. "You died and not just died but like ghost you moved on, I saw it happen. You can't be here."

"I don't understand it either," Jo shook her head, looking as if she was more in pain than she was confused. "I just. Dean, they took my mom's soul. I have to find her."

"What?" Dean knew what he had heard but that did not mean that he could believe it. Would just come up to heaven and take someone's soul away. Weren't there still rules that were good for something? "Who is they?"

"I don't know," Jo began to sob, wrapping her arms around Dean. Dean pulled her into him, rubbing her back and making his best soothing voice sound. He knew that it would not work. Hunters did not really have a calm down button once they got started, that sort of went for all of them. "They just, these guys, they came and sucked her soul into some glass thing and then left. They left the door open when they left and I got out. It didn't take me long to figure out where I was after that." "So you just took the exit in heaven and what?" Dean was still trying to make sense of the situation. Could anyone just escape from heaven and have another chance at a life?

"I am here aren't I?" Jo pulled away from Dean and made a circle in front of him. He could see it but seeing does not always mean believing. Part of him believed that he was still drunk, passed out in that motel room.

"How long have you been back?" Dean let the happiness of seeing Jo again flood over him and he stopped caring how or why she was there. There had been so much that he wished had gone differently between them. Like how he wished he could have told her that he could have seen himself loving her the way he knew she loved him, he just had needed time. Unfortunately, that was the one things hunters never really had the luxury of.

"A couple of weeks I think," Jo looked around, thinking about how long she had been around. There was no way of measuring the time. "I don't have to eat, or sleep, so I have kind of lost track of time."

"Do you think it is a demon that took Ellen?" Dean again went right back to business, sometimes it was unavoidable. Hunter was not his job; it was just who he was. Jo of all people would be able to understand that.

"I can't be sure. They just looked like regular guys." Jo informed Dean, pushing her hands into her pockets, she wished that she had more to tell him. "Can we maybe talk about this over a cup of coffee?"

"I thought you did not need to eat or anything?" Dean began to question.

"I said I don't need to," Jo smiled over at him. "That doesn't mean that I can't."

"Then coffee it is," Dean smiled wide, wrapping his arms around Jo's shoulder and heading in the direction of the diner that was across the street, big signs advertising their amazing breakfasts. Dean would just have to see how amazing they were. "My treat of course."

"I was going to make you pay anyways," Jo laughed, leaning into Dean. "Being dead is not a very profitable business."

"Some people pull it off," Dean informed her, thinking about those who talk to the dead or vampires who have jobs.

"Well thank you, hunter know it all," Jo poked a finger into Dean's side. She looked like she was about to cry but brushed it off, so Dean brushed it off as well. It was probably from all of the excitement of being back and seeing him again. If he was a super big crier, he would probably be teary eyed too.

Dean and Jo laughed all the way to their seats. Nothing was really that funny but the awkwardness of the situation was getting to the both of them and they were working to get past it. The waitress gave them a funny face but brought their coffees as soon as they sat down, not even bothering to ask if they wanted any. Coffee was probably a must have around here. Dean liked that in a town.

"So what is heaven like?" Dean asked Jo, curious as to what her heaven was and whether or not he was a part of it.

"Kind of like being here," Jo explained, "but with a lot more Déjà vu."

"Think your days are set on repeat?" Dean inquired.

"That is my guess," Jo shrugged her shoulders, "though I did not even realize any of it until after I was no longer in it. It just all kind of seems like a blurred memory that I am not allowed to really remember."

"Kind of makes you wonder what they are hiding up there," Dean thought aloud. Now that he knew of Heaven and that it truly existed, he had many more questions that before. "You think that maybe Angels are the one who took your mom?"

"Why would angels do something like that?" Jo did not believe that Angels were that horrible.

"Whoever said that angels were the good guys was lying," Dean turned his eyes away from looking out the window and pulled his coffee to his lips. It tasted like morning and sadly, the was not the best thing, but coffee was coffee.

"Dean," Jo leaned forward and Dean's eyes darted out to her but she was beginning to blur. What was happening. "Dean, are you okay?"

Jo paced back and forth in what appeared to be an abandoned warehouse. She was not sure how she had learned about this place but she knew it was where she needed to be. Dean was sitting in front of her, hands and feet tied tightly to a metal chair that was bolted to the ground. Jo knew that Dean was strong and she needed to do all that she could to restrain him. Now all she had to do was wait for him to wake up.

"Dean," Jo called out after waiting a while longer. It should not have been taking so long for him to come to. The drug that she gave him should have worn off by now. "Dean, wake up."

Dean slowly raised his head, eyes fluttering slowly, trying to bring themselves into consciousness. Soon his eyes were wide open and he was fighting against the restraints. His eyes soon landing on Jo, who was standing only feet in front of him.

"I knew it," Dean growled as he fought the restraints around his hands. "Who the hell are you?"

"I wish I could say that I was someone else, someone pretending to be Jo," Jo hung her head, not ready to make eye contact with Dean. "But it's me."

"You are a pathetic liar," Dean snarled through his teeth, seeming like a dog who was about to attack but the chain would not let him leave the yard. "Jo would never do something like that. Not ever."

"I know," Jo finally brought her tear filled eyes up to meet Dean's eyes and he frowned, trusting that it was in fact her.

"Why?" Dean begged for an answer quietly, he could not wrap his head around what was going on. Why was Jo doing this to him?

"Because they have my mom," Jo stated matter-of-fact. "They told me that if I wanted to save her soul, I had to kill you so they could take yours."

"And you believe them?" Dean questioned, all the anger in his voice gone.

"I have to," Jo shook her head at him. Whether it was true or not, she did not have any other options. "I wish I did not have to do this."

"I know," Dean gave her a smile and she wanted to cry. It was one thing to have him angry at her, hating her. But he was smiling at her and she could barely stand to look his direction.

"I have to do this," Jo repeated again, looking down at her feet.

"I know," Dean understood what she had to do and he was not angry at her. "You do what you have to do."

"Stop," Jo looked up at him, yelling through the tears. "Don't try to make this okay."

"I would kill you," Dean tried to make it easier for her but she knew better. Dean would never kill her. He would find a way to not have to. "If I had to save Sammy, you bet your ass I would do whatever I had to do."

"You wouldn't," Jo called him out on his lie.

"You would not even begin to believe the amount of people I have killed," Dean knew he was going to have to make himself into a monster. "Innocent people. All because I could not control myself. I stopped thinking before shooting and I just started asking questions later. Most of time, I did these things just to save Sam. I love you so much Jo, but if I had to save Sam. I would kill you."

Jo made her way over to Dean and held the knife she had to his face. Dean took a deep breath and then looked up at her, not showing any signs of fear but seeming as if he were enjoying this. This angered Jo but she still could not bring herself to kill him. She had loved Dean for a long time, she knew she was not going to be able to kill him.

"I don't want to do this," Jo dropped down to her knees in front of him. "Tell me what I should do."

"Jo," Dean worked to get her attention away from the ground and once he had it, he did his best to talk her through. "I am no helping anyone. I cause more damage than I do good. My soul is not worth anything anymore. But your mom, now that is a soul that deserves to be free. So you are going to pick that knife back up and you are going to stab me with it, do you understand."

"But I can't," Jo shook her head, tears falling so fast they were beginning to blind her.

"Do it," Dean yelled at her, putting his best angry voice on. "Come on Jo, Man up. Don't let this be another situation where you are too scared to do what needs to be done. That is why I never thought you were going to be a good hunter. You have never been strong enough."

"Dean stop," Jo grabbed the knife and rose to her feet. "Stop now."

"You are nothing more than a little girl," Dean continued, pushing Jo just as far as he could. "You should never have even been out there hunting with us that day but your mom just couldn't leave you behind. You were a risk to us all. You…"

The anger in Jo had finally hit its breaking point and Jo swung her hand forward quickly. The knife, sharp as could be slid into Dean's chest like it was meant to be there and Dean's body stiffened.

"See," Dean looked down at the knife in his chest and then back up to Jo. "That was not so hard was it?"

Dean tried his best to smile up at Jo but he no longer had it in him. Pain turned into numbness and then there was nothing. Dean's head hung low against his chest as he took his last breath and Jo collapsed against him.

"I am so sorry," Jo cried out, "Dean!"

"This just gets sappier every time," A voice appeared behind Jo and she jumped up, pulling the knife out of Dean's chest and turning toward the unwanted visitor. "But it does happen quicker each time. Who knows, maybe next time you can kill him in the motel parking lot."

"Who are you?" Jo asked into the darkness. "Where is my mother?"

"Where she has always been," Crowley stepped out of the darkness and into sight of Jo. "In heaven where she belongs."

"But I saw you take her," Jo dropped to her knees, the events of the day replaying in her mind. Soon she could see it all, every cup of coffee, every stab to the chest. This was not the first time she had killed Dean.

"Get it yet?" Crowley asked, stepping over to admire Dean's dead body.

"Where am I?" Jo looked up at him, unable to move any other part of her body. "Why are you doing this to me?"

"Hell," Crowley pointed around at the room and suddenly it was all black. It was as if Crowley, herself and Dean's dead body were in a pitch black room with a spotlight shining only on them. "And I am doing this because … well, because I can."

"Please make it stop," Jo looked over at Dean and saw every face he had ever made when she stabbed, shot or strangled him. How many times had she killed the man she loved? "Just make it stop."

"That is not how it works," Crowley informed her. "Hell is forever darling; you just have to get used to it."

"I can't do this again," Jo begged, placing her head against the cold floor. "Please make it stop."

"Take two thousand fifty-three, the death of Dean Winchester," Crowley laughed, as Dean disappeared. Soon Crowley was nowhere to be seen, it was just Jo in the darkness, by Crowley's voice remained. "In three … two … one … action."

Jo watched as Dean fumbled his way out of a cheap motel room. She was not sure what she was going to say to him. What were you supposed to say to the man who were supposed to kill? "Hey, how you been? I have to kill you now." This was not going to go great.


End file.
